Hello dear, It’s been a long time since I didn’t write you anything. I want to tell you that I’m okay and everything is okay. I’m so happy with my life now and I’m truly grateful for it more than ever. But I want you to know that everything seems to change time by time and I can’t resist it. I know you’ve changed too and found another girl that ‘click’ you. I don’t know what to say but I almost forgot how do you look like, I almost can’t remember your voice anymore, sometimes I miss you, sometimes I don’t.
I wonder how’d you still remember me? What would I do if one day we’re meeting each other, it must be awkward? I’m trying to erase you from my long term memory, I’m trying. But maybe someone has to do it for me when the time just ready.
I want you to know my mind is scattered right now. There’s just too many books to read, to many journals to be analyzed, too many movies waiting to be watch, to many problems to be solved, too many word in mind demand to be written, too many dreams in head, too many places need to be visited, too many love worth waiting for. It’s just like I never tell anyone about this before but you. I’m trying to get used to it. I hope you do well.
I care, yes. I “cling”, yes. I love, infinitely. I forgive (some would say) to easily. I do wear my heart on my sleeve and I won’t dumb my heart down to make you feel better, because better should be you want me to “cling” to you. To care and love you infinitely. I look for a forgiving partner with patients, why do you run from it? Because you’re not ready… But what is ready? When is it ready? How do you know? How can you know if you’re not shooing your twin flame into the wind because your heart was damaged by someone who isn’t me?
I am okay though oddly enough. I miss you, but I’m not in tragic emotional pain because of your lack of ability to handle my heart. I care still, but I’m not as devastated as I’d foreseen… I’m surprised. But I also could be numb. Probably a little bit. One twirl at a time… I am mine and I’ll dance as I please. My spirit still soars. You didn’t destroy me, thank you.
Ex Back Goddess by Kate Robinson